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He said he didn’t act on his same-sex feelings until late in high school when he participated in local theater productions.

“Homosexuality was a lot more open in the theater community,” He said. “I would show up to the rehearsals and production and people just gave me so much praise.” 

“It was like instant gratification. All of this amazing feeling. Because again, I grew up bullied. I grew up feeling like I wasn’t enough.”

The associate pastor in San Antonio said;

“I became heavy into drugs and alcohol and had an on-and-off boyfriend, who eventually broke up when i refused to be more open about my sexuality.

“I was brokenhearted. And I was trying to fill a void in my heart that I had for such a long time,” he said, adding that he “craved attention from men and began “looking for it in all the wrong places.” 

“I started being super promiscuous and going on hook-up apps and trying to find somebody.”

Benjamin Blake said despite all his trials and attempts, he didn’t feel fulfilled.

Blake said his mother introduced the idea of him attending a ministry school in Hamilton, Alabama. Although he was reluctant, he attended the school.

He recalled one worship service on the campus where the worship leader said something that changed his perspective on life.

“The worship leader stopped and she was like. I feel like the Lord wants me to say this, that there are people in this room that the fact that you have said ‘yes’ to going to this school and being here today, your ‘yes’ is literally setting you up for a destiny that you never could have imagined,’” he recalled.

As the worship continued, Benjamin Blake recalled feeling something he had never felt before. He said, “I actually started feeling happy.” 

“I had struggled with suicidal thoughts,” Blake recounted. “I had struggled with anxiety. I had struggled with all of this darkness. I had struggled with loneliness and not feeling like I was enough. Like I had been through so much at this point, that when I felt this happiness, just come over me, I was like, ‘what is this?’”

Blake said as soon as he encountered the presence of God, he wanted to start preaching although he was still struggling with same sex attraction.

Then after a Christian conference, he vowed and promised God not to go back to homosexuality.

“I started being open with my struggle with homosexuality,” he said

Benjamin Blake opened up about his sexuality to a campus leader who drew him closer to Jesus and mentored him. He also met wife not long after.

“I think that it’s really important for anyone struggling with homosexuality, for you to get a man or woman of God that is willing to look past who you’ve been and what you’ve done and look past your struggles and say, ‘let’s get through this together,’” he said.