Welcome to the concluding part of this edition. In the first edition, we established that there are biblical steps to follow in finding a marriage partner. This week, we shall examine the other steps to Will You Marry Me?
Make yourself Fit for Marriage: Another prerequisite in finding a life partner is making yourself fit for marriage in all aspects of life, that is, physically, spiritually, materially and mentally. As much as you will not just settle down for any person in marriage because you would not compromise some qualities, it is, therefore, necessary to make a conscious effort to become as good as the type of person you desire.
Lester Sumrall, one of God’s great generals who was married for more than half a century, said, “The key to success in marriage is not so much as marrying the right person but becoming the right person.” Instead, people keep bombarding the gates of heaven with their cries. The Word says: And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother’s eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye? Or how wilt thou say to thy brother, Let me pull out the mote out of thine eye; and, behold, a beam is in thine own eye? Thou hypocrite, first cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother’s eye (Matthew 7:3-5)
How do you intend to remove the spec (or broomstick) in your brother’s eye when you have a log of wood in your own eye? Which is greater? Is it not when you have taken the log of wood out of your own eyes you can see clearly enough to help your brother remove the broomstick in his eye? In case you have been praying and fasting for the right person, change gear and start praying, “Lord, make me the right person.”
Haven’t you heard it said that birds of the same feather flock together? If you are an unserious Christian, how do you expect a serious Christian to marry you? Even if God showed him in a dream that you are his wife, he will say, “No Sir!” because two cannot walk together unless they agree. As you make yourself right, God will add to you the blessing of a life partner.
Let your heart pant after God and His kingdom and purpose in your heart to be more prayerful, addicted to the Word and service-minded, and you can expect heaven to send your way His chosen young man or young woman.
Remember, like begets like, and water seeks its own level. If you desire a pastor as a partner, you must build yourself up in the things of God. If you desire a financial pillar for the church of Christ as a partner, you must build yourself as a worthy compliment. If you want something good, you must consciously work on yourself and become good.
Physical Appearance: Physical appearance also matters a lot in finding a partner. It is the first attraction before many other things that end the question, Will you marry me? A wise man once said that the way you dress determines the way you will be addressed. A young man whose general appearance depicts laziness, carelessness, irresponsibility and unkemptness at all times will definitely not attract any single lady’s attention. No woman will welcome any proposal from this kind of man. On the other hand, if you are a woman who wants to marry a faithful, handsome, respectable and God-fearing gentleman as your knight in shining armour, you have to make yourself twice as faithful, respectable, beautiful and God-fearing too (Matthew 7:12; see also Proverbs 27:17).
However, in finding a marriage partner, do not consider an unbeliever in your choice for marriage, no matter the choice, qualities, vision, dream or counsel. You must ensure your intended partner is born-again and has accepted Jesus Christ as his or her Lord and Saviour. The Word says: Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness? And what concord hath Christ with Belial…(2 Corinthians 6:14-16). The unbeliever is out of consideration in your choice of who to marry. Seek a partner who believes in the same faith as you do.
However, to make the right choice, you need the help of God. To access the help of God, you need to accept Jesus as your Lord and Saviour. So, if you are not born-again, please say this prayer of faith: Dear Lord, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me my sins. Cleanse me with Your precious Blood. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Now, I know I am born again!
Congratulations, you are now born again and a child of God. He loves you and will never leave or forsake you. With this, you are guaranteed all-round rest and peace, in Jesus’ name! Please write or call to share your testimonies with me through email@example.com OR 08141320204.
For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian Bookstores: Single with A Difference, Making Marriage Work, Marriage Covenant, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored), and Single and not Entangled.