[ARTICLE] A WISE CHOICE BY FAITH OYEDEPO

 

Every step in life is precipitated by a choice. You are a creature of choice, not an evolutionary accident. Your choice is what determines your destiny in every dimension (Deuteronomy.30:19). This implies that the security of your marital destiny is a function of the choices that you make. Therefore, the starting point of adequate preparation for a great marriage actually begins from your years of being a single, before you ever get to know, meet or choose your marriage partner.

It begins with self-discovery. The discovery of your spiritual identity is crucial for the realization of your glorious marital destiny. You need to discover yourself before you try to discover your spouse. Where are you heading for in life? What is your vision, goal, dream, and destination? A proper understanding of this is required because it will determine how and who you choose. The lack of understanding and wisdom is the reason why many marital destinies are truncated (Prov.24:14; Hos.4:6). Spiritual understanding is more precious than gold and silver (Psalm.49:20).

Success in any endeavor is a function of attitude. An ‘anyhow’ attitude can only culminate in an ‘anyhow’ result. Only an intense commitment and personal responsibility culminates into outstanding success (Eccl.9:10). Deliberately make investment into your own life in all areas. Spiritually, establish a strong relationship with God through Word study and prayer. This will no doubt enhance your spiritual stamina, which will be an advantage to you in building a strong marriage in future. You can either choose to be an asset or liability in your marriage, but you cannot possess your glorious marital life if you are a liability. You are a kingdom asset; you are bought with a price. Therefore, the virtues of your life are determined by the value that you place upon your destiny (Corinthians 6:19-20).

Most importantly, infuse light into your quest for a glorious marital destiny through a conscious and genuine thirst for increase in spiritual knowledge. Position yourself rightly for the lighting from God’s Word to dispel every form of darkness around your life. This is your guarantee for a marital life free from shame and reproach (Psalm.34:5). Also the bible says: ... a man of knowledge increaseth strength (Proverbs 24: 5)

Determining whom you marry is a very vital issue in the journey of life and in fulfilling your marital destiny. The decision making of a spouse is a critical decision to make in life and it can become a source of frustration when you are not adequately equipped (Eccl.10:15). Therefore, earnestly desire and thirst for supernatural wisdom (Proverb.4:8;  1 Corinthians 12:30)

For you to determine whom you will like to spend the rest of your life with; for you to have a fulfilled marital destiny, you have to know who you are and what you are. Knowing whom and what you are is the acknowledgement and acceptance of responsibility. The knowledge of your personality and character is critical to the eventual process of ‘leaving and cleaving’ to your future partner (Mark 10:6-8).

In your best interest, what you are should determine what you desire. Compatibility is therefore a key factor in this regard. When a single person wants to marry, there are certain preparations he or she must make. As a Christian, you must first seek the face of God in prayers. Such a person needs the guidance of God in locating the person you want to marry. Most importantly, your choice of a life partner must be a ‘kingdom citizen’ (2 Corinthian 6:14-18).

In determining your spouse, you need to know the Will of God regarding your marital destiny, thereby settling your marital destiny spiritually. As a child of God, there is the need to settle your marital destiny in the spiritual before attempting it in the physical. Now when you do this, the physical aspect of your marital destiny begins to fall into place automatically with ease. In essence you cannot pursue the security of your marital destiny carnally (Rom.8:6). God showed His interest in marriage by personally fashioning the woman (Eve) and delivering her to her husband, (Adam). The union of man and woman in marriage is not man’s idea, or a cultural and traditional affair; it is God’s own idea (Genesis 2:20-24). Every child of God needs the manufacturer’s manual, the Word of God for the foundation of your marital destiny. It is important for you to know that when you remove God from your affair, you cannot expect any progress. God’s Word says: For every house is builded by some man; but he that built all things is God (Hebrews 3:4)

The choices we make are largely determined by how informed we are.  When you are well informed, you will make life-transforming choices. But, like my husband says: to be uninformed is to be deformed. If you are not well informed, the choices you make can deform your destiny. So, broaden your information base, get informed. Before you make any choice, get necessary information on the subject matter from godly proven sources.

To make a wise choice, you need Jesus in your life. You can accept Him now if you have not done so. If you will like to do this, please say this prayer: “Dear Lord Jesus, I come to You today as a sinner. I believe You died for my sins and rose on the third day.  Forgive me of my sins. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today”.

Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write and share your testimonies with me through contact@faithoyedepo.org, and counselling@faithoyedepo.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian Bookstores: Singles With A Difference, Make Your Life Count Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building a Successful Family, and Welcome to God’s Family.